How to make Chili con carne (The Cray way)

Ok, say that you're sitting infront of your computer. And you fancy some chili with beans in it. Well, fear not, because Cray is here to teach you all how to make it! Cray style! Just a warning thought: I'm not a real cook. And most of my cooking consist of frying different items in very hot oil. So I'm just making this up while I go along.

Ok, first thing you'll need is some ground beef. And a pot. The pot is quite essential. Now you just take some butter, put it in the pot, heat it until it's fry worthy, and put the meat in there.

The more the better!

Stir it around until it looks all good and stuff. You know, like brown. Then it's time for the crushed tomatoes. Just pour it right in there and stir it all around.

It looks like something died in there.

Add some spices! And with some, I mean a shitload of spices!

Remember to stir like the Japanese! Guide here!

Now all you have to is to wait around 7 minutes. I usually take this time to contemplate on the big mysteries of life. Like why we are alive, how to merge the two theories about relativity and where the fuck my can opener is. 

A screw driver works just as well

Seriously, I always loose that thing. Anywho, when your 7 minutes are up, you're probably a much wiser person. This means that it's time to add them beans! 

Stir them up nicely and let boil for another 3 minutes or so. Try to remember if you forgot something.

Onions!

I also added some onions in there. Forgot to mention that. After adding all the stuff we're almost done. Now it's time for some good ol' tasting. Just make sure that the... whatever it is we're making is spicy enough. 

Chili.

At first I though it was really okay. But then I remembered that I wasn't a 12 year old girl. So I added some more chili.

Chili.

And then even more chili!

Chili.

 MORE CHILI!!

Done

And then you're done! This is about the time you realize that you forgot to put on the rice. Make sure to find another pot and add 3 parts rice to 5 parts water and let it boil for like... forever. Rice takes a really long time to get done. It's not even funny.

When the rice is all non-crunchy, it's done. Serve and enjoy your food!

Then remember that you don't even like chili nor beans and go fry up some fries. Server with some sweet & sour sauce in an egg cup. And you're done! For real this time.

I could eat this 24/7

Well, that's all from me this evening. Be well.